Chupacabra Disco, the book

Now at Lulu & due soon at Amazon is Chupacabra Disco, by Misti Rainwater. She did an art book of photos & collages years ago but deleted that on account of it being "trash" & I prepared this book for her as a completely revised new edition with only a select  few of the original works preserved. It's more expensive than we might wish on account of the high quality paper & premium ink.

Some of the pics are originally by me but Misti edited them. Stella works better with me because I'm her dada & she loves me because I'm not a massive bitch, apparently.

The end result is splendid. The USA-themed parts are almost savage in their exposure of yank trashiness. Parental content warnings on Freddy Fender ffs. There are no iguanas in the later pictures, which is sad but I might do an iguana book later. The local iguanas are pretty fucked up though, so I'm not sure if Amazon would stock the book. Despite the lack of iguanas, or any other lizard, this book is excellent & I'm very proud of Misti's art.

Chupacabra Disco: MAJESTIC as FUCK

Chupacabra Disco: MAJESTIC as FUCK: my favorite bird must be the lunar eclipse in piSceS MISTI LOVES DAVID  

Little House on the Squirting Prairie

Yesterday, Misti cried at the episodes in season seven of Little House on The Prairie where Adam might fail the bar exam. During the morning fuck she channeled Mary the blind bitch with "Pa, pa, is that you Pa?" until I was unable to finish, though she squirted copiously. No matter, because today is leg day & tonight I don't care if she channels Pa himself.

Anyway, here's RETARD PENIS.

& here's HENRIETTA REMEMBERS.

 

 

Henrietta remembers

I have just produced a better third edition of my only currently available novel, Henrietta remembers. I am doing this because Misti really likes it & did a cover for a new edition. There are minor alterations to the text & a considerable improvement in the formatting. 

The book is at present only on Lulu at this link, but will be coming to Amazon soon. Anything by this name on Amazon now will be whatever copies they have left of the second edition. Blurb & cover follow.

I'll preface this with full disclosure. I receive David's cock on a regular basis, he makes better tacos than any Mexican and we are getting married in Capricorn season 2027. I had a weird reaction to Henrietta Remembers. I started sobbing and then I pretended like I was going to punch David in his stomach. I cursed at him in an aggressive Incredible Hulk type voice. I'm angry that he's a better writer than I am! He's from Wales! I'm from Texas! He attended Oxford! I attended The University of Texas at San Antonio! Bastard.

Misti Rainwater

 

Courtney & Killing Kurt

Recently, in our non-PC collection, RETARD PENIS, I wrote that if anyone is to kill a Pisces, & somebody has to, it should be a Cancer. Now, Cobain was Pisces sun, Cancer moon, Virgo ascendant. He has Mercury & Venus in Pisces, like me, so the songs could be OK, but the sun made him a trashy sub. They both had Cancer moons so they were both, on some level, blubbering whiny bitches. Cobain's NN was Taurus, so he was just going to get heavily invested in eating. Love's NN is Cancer, so she was just going to get heavily invested in crying (which she has actually done) & already mastered being a professional bitch.

Neither of them has anything in Aries or Aquarius so they can both go fuck themselves.

My fiancee, Misti Rainwater, has today done the following YouTube tarot reading where she alleges that Love is going to be a hungry ghost because she is a sea of attachments &, obviously, Cobain would never have been man enough to provide the dickdown she needed. With Venus in Gemini she'd fuck anything anyway, as is empirically confirmed by her ambitious programme of infidelity.

Essentially, I still maintain that grunge is a PR stunt by the flannel industry & nobody cares about some pop singer who died ages ago, after releasing one pretty good album. More importantly, I have a nice shoulder & arm pump & our book is available here & you'd still be a massive cunt not to buy it. We mock a dead child in this book & talk shit about writers, living & dead, as well as laying down the law about astrology because we have a total of 119 years experience as professional astrologers & tarot readers, so go suck it.

 

RETARD PENIS

Misti Rainwater & I have produced the enchanting masterpiece RETARD PENIS. This is a book of great wisdom & profundity, also squirting, & it will fix all your major malfunctions. 

It explains why Crowley dissed on Leo, & it is accordingly published in retard season & is rather short, being only 103 numbered pages. In this book, we also explain why Courtney Love had no choice. Pisces must be stopped. 

God directed Misti's pen & goddess, who is real, directed mine. The book is mostly about iguanas, as I remember.

It is at this link & you'd have to be a massive cunt not to buy it.

 

 

Chupacabra Disco: kurt cobain's suicide letter as edited by kathleen...

It's unlikely but possible that people buy a book called RETARD PENIS & still get offended. In this book I defend the right of a Cancer to kill a Pisces partner, because somebody has got to do it. I, in particular, am exceptionally offensive in this book. 

Chupacabra Disco: kurt cobain's suicide letter as edited by kathleen...: That's the title of my latest piece for RETARD PENIS, coming soon for the pathologically curious and terminally bored. Flash fiction, pr...

DATA CENTER SMOKE BREAK

Here's hoping they all burn down.

Track by Chupacabra Disco at bandcamp at this link.

 

 

Plunderphonic noise "mastered the universe"

A second album by Chupacabra Disco of post rock plunderphonic noise with arbitrary & extremely distorted vocal tracks from Misti singing karaoke thrown in, paired with noise and Misti's guitar. The plundered songs are a very diverse mix, pencilneck garbage to stone cold classics, & Skeletor himself would be pleased by this nonsense. 

It's called "mastered the universe" & is linked here. The price is $9.

 

Posthuman Poetry & Prose merch

Thanks to Misti Rainwater we now have merch on sale at Red Bubble.  Hoodies, tees, sweats etc, but living here tees is really the only option. 

Here's the Swooncake Press shop by the way, since Misti has thousands of products available there & I encourage her to make money. I'm high maintenance.

There's even a Chupacabra Disco design below that is also linked here.

The Chupacabra Disco bandcamp is here. 

 

 

RETARD PENIS

I think Gertrude Stein would approve of our new project RETARD PENIS. It's supposed to be flash fiction but that's a lit bro thing & I'm too well-endowed for that so I'm doing aphorisms & various observations. I don't deny that Courtney maybe killed Kurt, I'm just saying that if anyone kills a Pisces, & somebody has got to do it, it might as well be a Cancer.  

Anyway, Misti did the cover below. In other news, we are doing tees & sweatshirts & hoodies for Posthuman Poetry & Prose, so we have fucking merch, bitches.  

 

 

SUPER CHERRY EXTRA

I have today finished converting Misti's original masters for SUPER CHERRY EXTRA to lossless digital form & today released the album at this link on Bandcamp, bless their cotton socks. In a sense this is the first real release of the album, since it has previously only had a limited release as cassette. The full album is $9 & each of the 18 tracks is $1 if bought separately. It's free to listen to the first track.